Comments on: The Bitterest Pill

By: George's Mum

George's Mum — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 22:00:56 +0000

hey… we're having a homemade/free/recycled Christmas this year.

Have a look at http://www.uk.freecycle.org/ for some really good free stuff! We've got everything from table and chairs to books/dvds/toys for free as people want to give it to a good home. Worth a look.

I think Christmas has totally got out of hand- people's expectations are so high re presents it's ridiculous. I hope you have a lovely Christmas x x x

By: Mummy Outnumbered

Mummy Outnumbered — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 21:21:49 +0000

It just shows we worry far too much about how people will take things and get ourselves all worked up when really all that matters is that you have a loving family around you…. anything else on top of that is just a bonus!

By: alybean

alybean — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 21:11:36 +0000

We had the same thing happened to us last year.My husband and I are both self employed for the same company.The kids had many stocking fillers from us and all our relatives and friends got them big presents.We had to borrow continously from our parents which when you are in your 30's isn't easy to do.I hope things get better for you.

Aly
My Hodge Podge Life

By: Then There Were Three

Then There Were Three — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 20:58:58 +0000

Well done you. Really. This year we have told everyone that we can't afford much as I am on SMP and with the new baby etc things are tight… we're lucky as Mr earns well enough, but our income has been slashed in half pretty much. I think a lot of people are suffering this year, and I applaud you for saying it out loud xxx

By: Insomniac Mummy

Insomniac Mummy — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 20:51:07 +0000

I'd like to thank everyone who has responded to this post. I didn't realise it'd get such a big response!

The recession has hit so many so hard this year. I consider myself lucky. It's a sad fact that there are plenty struggling much more than us.

If this post has encouraged even one person to speak up and ease the burden just a little then something good has happened.

Thanks again everyone.

xxxxxxxx

By: Vic

Vic — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 20:35:40 +0000

You've done a brave and difficult thing, one that most of us wouldn't ever be able to. Here's to hoping 2010 will be better.

By: Linda

Linda — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 15:17:44 +0000

The people who love you do not define you because of how much money you have or haven't got. Those close to me have known the most appalling hardship this year with someone whom I love dearly having lost the roof over their family's head. I couldn't care less about presents off them for Christmas, I just want them to be well again and escape the crushing depression that has enveloped them. Love and laughter don't have to cost a penny, much love to you. Money was often very tight when I was growing up and we laughed a lot, still do. Good day. x

By: Natalie

Natalie — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 12:24:06 +0000

I'm sure it feels like a weight off now that you have said it as the pressure builds up otherwise, compounding the stress further. We can't be and do everything and sometimes, we have to ask for help. I hope things get better for you asap and sorry to hear about Big E's virus.

By: dulwich divorcee

dulwich divorcee — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 11:27:01 +0000

Hope things ease up soon – my fingers crossed for you

By: dulwich divorcee

dulwich divorcee — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 11:25:40 +0000

So glad you had the courage to say something – must be such a relief – and really hope things ease up soon. My fingers crossed for you

By: Surprised and Excited Mum

Surprised and Excited Mum — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 10:33:07 +0000

Toughie. But well done you.

The universe will provide and hopefully in the month of giving it will be you who receives.

Well done for being brave. It's so very tough at the mo, and so many are barely treading water (me included) I hope you get back on an even keal soon.

By: Looking Fab in your forties

Looking Fab in your forties — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 10:30:06 +0000

I am sure you will have a great Christmas just being with those you love xx

By: Liz (LivingwithKids)

Liz (LivingwithKids) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 10:12:52 +0000

You're so right. I've always found it difficult to ask for help when I need it but when you do you always find people are only too pleased and will go out of their way. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and that things improve for you next year.

By: Littlemummy

Littlemummy — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 10:06:38 +0000

There's a lot of people sharing your boat. 2010 will be better. X

By: A Modern Mother

A Modern Mother — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 09:51:37 +0000

Pride sucks. Sorry this is a hard Christmas for you.

By: Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 08:29:17 +0000

Good for you. You are right, it is so hard to ask for help, to admit that you are struggling a bit, but you have so done the right thing. Your family sound as if they will be able to support you, not necessarily financially, but by being there for you. That is worth all the money in the world. Big hugs and I'm ever so in awe of you – I find asking for help the hardest thing in the world. x

By: muummmmeeeeee......

muummmmeeeeee...... — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 05:26:45 +0000

Good for you! Sounds like your priorities are in the right place and you've got the help and support of a lovely family x

By: Manic Mother

Manic Mother — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 01:29:27 +0000

Beautifully written, pride gets in my way a lot too, I hate asking for help!

By: Crystal Jigsaw

Crystal Jigsaw — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 20:20:45 +0000

It's such a relief when you realise you have a good family support behind you. We've been having a hard time too and had to do the same, admitting is hard but sometimes we have to step back from ourselves. Take care and I hope things get better for you in the very near future.

CJ xx

By: rosiescribble

rosiescribble — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 17:28:34 +0000

I am so pleased you have said something and I'm not surprised your family are understanding. They should be there for us under all circumstances. They don't need presents to know you love them.

By: Mwa

Mwa — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 14:37:22 +0000

Big hug to you! What a brave and very sensible thing to do. xxx

By: woodpecker

woodpecker — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 14:23:33 +0000

You did the right thing and it took a lot of courage to do so. So often pride is a heavy burden that weighs us down and grinds us into the ground.
I too felt invincible and muddled along putting on the brave face never admitting that I really needed help.
My circumstances were different from your own, my problems were not financial. Shrugging that pride off my shoulder and asking for help was the best thing I ever did.
I hope things work out for you and that Christmas will be special knowing that you do indeed have such wonderful friends and family around you.

By: Harriet

Harriet — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 06:27:07 +0000

We have started doing secret santa in our family, it saves money and also saves people getting moutains of rubbish gifts they never wanted in the first place.
I wouldn't feel too bad as something like 75% of gifts are unwanted!
Keep what money you have for your family I'm sure you will have a great Christmas not matter what!

By: april

april — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 23:58:04 +0000

and good grief that sounded condescending – GAH! I cannot write coherently today. Just I hope things improve and am impressed by your courage. No one talks about anything in my family.

By: april

april — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 23:56:41 +0000

Well done, very brave. I just suggested Kris Kringle to my family and had to try to borrow some money from my parents (the horror of that was – well another story – and they said no, ask your grandparents- yet to do that) It is one of the hardest things in the world to do and such a relief when you do it. Well done, you were very brave, and I hope thing pick up very soon. *hug*

By: Josie @Sleep is for the Weak

Josie @Sleep is for the Weak — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 23:03:26 +0000

I can SO relate to this. I'm in total denial about Christmas - keep putting off thinking about it. At some point I am going to have to face the fact that we have NO money for presents this year - like you we're just about scraping enough for groceries and essential bills. I just don't know where we're expected to find another couple hundred quid from.

I'm not very good at swallowing my pride either. And I'm dreading THAT conversation with the family. I think the worst thing is that they are all sooooo generous - we'll be overlaoded with presents. It feels so hard not to be able to recipricate.

Well done you for being sensible. And I really hope things pick up for you soon xxx

By: bumblingalong

bumblingalong — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 22:34:10 +0000

So many people are struggling at the mo – you are not alone! I don't think there will be many gifts being exchanged this year amongst our family.

You have plenty to be proud about – concentrate on them!

By: Laura C

Laura C — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 22:19:05 +0000

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time. It isn't easy when you have to count the pennies. I hope it gets better in the New Year for you all.

By: Kelly

Kelly — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 22:19:05 +0000

Many people say that "I'm sorry" is the hardest thing to say but i do not agree.

"I need help" is a hell of a lot harder. I hope things pick up for you soon!

By: Mum with carrot in her hair

Mum with carrot in her hair — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 18:53:18 +0000

Its so hard to do but you definitely did the right thing and I'm so pleased you're getting some help x