Today I feel lost and numb.
My lovely Grandma is critically ill in hospital and I just cannot shake off the feeling of impending doom.
We were supposed to go and see her at the weekend but both the kids are poorly so we didn’t want to risk making her ill. She’d had a chest infection and been in hospital.
Turns out they didn’t keep her in long enough. The infection spread and is now deep in her lungs. She is unconscious and not responding to oxygen, nebulisers, antibiotics or steroids.
She has a weak heart and they have said they won’t resuscitate her should the worst happen.
I am wracked with guilt.
Guilt that we didn’t see her at the weekend. Or that life took over and we haven’t seen as much as we used to.
Guilt that maybe I didn’t tell her I love her often enough, or that I took her for granted.
Most of all I feel guilt that I cannot be with her right now just to hold her hand.
I hope my Grandma knows how loved she is and I pray that I have a chance to tell her once more.
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Oh honey – trust me on this one – if you feel this way, she knows you love her, that you care. This must be so awful for you. many good thoughts and virtual hugs coming your way and your grandmothers.
She knows you love her. I felt very much the same way when my grandmother (paternal) was ill. I was away in college and couldn't come home because of finals. I was racked with guilt and there wasn't anything anyone could say to console me. Even she told me that she understood and loved me I couldn't and still can't get over it. I think of her often, especially when I use her recipes! Your grandma knows – don't think for a minute that she doesn't.
IM my heart goes out to you. I never knew my Grandma's, but MadDdad's Gran was a wondeful woman and if she was anything to go by then your Gran will understand why you couldnt visit and will know just how much you love her. I pray you get your wish to be able to tell her too. Thinking of you.
I'm sure she knows you love her just as you know she loves you. I'm so sorry you've had such scary news.
Thinking of you and your family.
No guilt sweetheart – she knows you love her. Your love and thoughts for her will cover the miles and be with her now when she needs it.
Much love to you
xxx
Please don't feel guilty that you didn't see your grandma at the weekend. I'm sure she knows exactly how much you love and care for her. Keep her in your thoughts and think of all the good times you've had. x
Oh shit hon, I am sure that you knows just how much you love her. I hope you get to see her and tell her. Much love. (Hugs). xx
Oh Ellie, she knows how much you love her, she's your Grandma. If it's of any help my Dad was in a coma when I was little and he remembers people talking to him when he was unconscious. So go and visit her and tell her. Lots of love and hugs coming to you from us xxxx
Big hug to you!
Maybe you could burn a candle for her? It's a way of being with her without being there in person.
Hope you manage to go over and see her.
My thoughts and love with you.
BNM
xx
massive hugs hun, I'm sure your grandma knows how much you love her and I hope you get the chance to see her xxxxx
Thanks for all you lovely wishes.
There is still no change. She has pneumonia and they've told us to expect the worst
(
So sorry to read about this. It is clear you love her dearly, therefore, she is bound to know that already. You don't need to tell her, she'll already feel it in her heart. Thinking of you and your family.
So sorry top hear this. I hope you're ok.
Like others have said, she knows you love her. Talk to her and tell her how you feel. I'm sure in some way she will hear you. xxx