I’ve come over all broody.
Earlier this week one of my most special friends gave birth, 3 weeks early, to a beautiful 5lb 11oz baby girl. I am totally over the moon for her and her husband, so much so the excitement may have contributed to a bit of a tumble I had.
Having hoarded all Little E’s ‘tiny baby up to 7lb 8oz’ baby clothes from last year I offered to send a parcel out for their little bundle.
Last night I opened the dresser in our bedroom and began sorting through the clothes. Tiny babygros, miniature vests, sweet little tops and leggings. All perfectly pressed, folded, stored and outgrown. Memories flooded back from when she was my baby bird with skinny sparrow legs, light as a feather. I can hardly believe that the baby slumbering quietly in the crook of my arm as I type is that same child. How fast they grow and alter!
That’s when it popped in my head, and not for the first time in recent weeks. What if we had another baby?
After I had Big E, still in the theatre after his forceps delivery, I swore one baby was enough. I felt lucky and privileged to have him after having miscarriages and was just so happy to finally have him in my arms. Then six months down the line I found myself wondering if we should have another. Of course the rest is history. Little E arrived in May 2009.
I’ve protested to anyone who’ll listen that I’m done with the baby making. Two is my limit. But here, I find myself imagining another.
Is it really such a bad idea? Can finances allow it? Should that even matter?
I half wish the husband objected to the idea, but the doesn’t. Hmmmm. So, I’m not going to rush into anything. I’m going to give it a good few months. Maybe this feeling will pass. But for now I’m not sure my family is complete yet.
When did you feel your family was complete?
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lying flat on my back when the sonographer said ‘there’s three in here’.
.-= grit´s last blog ..quid pro quo =-.
Ah, yes, I guess that’d be the moment!
Oh how exciting – Spring is in the air !!
Isn’t it just!
I still get twinges of broodiness but now it’s less of a OMG MUST REPRODUCE feeling and more a, “Oh! A baby might be nice..?” kind of thing. But this is four babies on
I wonder if the broody thing ever really goes. I hope so! I can’t keep changing my mind everytime I have another.
For me, I don’t know if the reason it’s gone is because Bob’s had a vasectomy so I know that it’s not a legitimate possibility anymore. The decision has been taken out of my hands?
.-= Vonnie´s last blog ..What to do? =-.
Hubby and I always said 3-4. After my 1st I knew I wanted another. Same after my 2nd. In fact, that’s when I started to imagine that I would never *not* want to have another. “What if I can’t stop?” I asked a friend. She said, “When you’re done, you’ll just know.” When my 3rd son was born, I knew fairly early on that I was done. I felt content. And honestly, since he was born I’ve never had a yearning to have another. Not saying that won’t change, but I feel pretty confident it won’t.
I think you’ll know. And I’m sure it’s normal to have moments of thinking another would be nice. So you’re right. Sit on it a little while. The desire may pass. But if it doesn’t and the yearning is still there…GO FOR IT!
x
.-= Jodie at Mummy Mayhem´s last blog ..Valentines, Schmalentines =-.
That’s what I fee like now, what if I can’t stop? I’m hoping I can resolve how I feel sooner rather than later as that biological clock isn’t ticking backwards!
I always wanted 4. I have three and an age gap I hadn’t counted on in my dreamy pre-child days. I feel I am done but that has more to do with being 42 than any feeling of completeness. If we’d had the space Paul would have had a sibling within 18 months like my older two. But that’s life Jim and the thought of having another now that Paul is 4 makes me shudder!
.-= MrsW´s last blog ..Fix it Friday #43 =-.
I wonder if there ever is a ‘right’ gap to have between. I’m thinking it’d be hard whenever I chose so no point putting it off. Having said that, it would be nice to have Big E in school.
I thought I was done with 2 but broodiness hit really badly once I had stopped feeding my daughter at 14 months. I’d gone all out with buying pink things as I was sure that one boy and one girl was my limit but it turns out it wasn’t! Of course 16 months of trying, a miscarriage and a pregnancy I had a boy and had to buy everything again. Though he may have been seen out and about with a pink cosy on the pushchair
Am I glad I did? You bet I am! I know it sounds daft as he’s only tiny, but my son is really one of the nicest people I’ve met. Of course I don’t have a career or job to think of otherwise things might have been very different. Thing is I’m having broody thoughts again but I really don’t think we could manage another just yet, if at all.
.-= Claire´s last blog ..Cheese and crackers =-.
I really did expect two to be enough and am quite shocked that I feel this way! Now’t wrong with pink cosies for boys, my little girl has had far more than her fair share of her brother’s stuff
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I still have odd little twinges of broodiness, I think it is normal, but I am 42 and I will probably be one of the oldest at the school gates when my 3 year old starts school, and I am tired. In a perfect world I would have liked 3 but I am totally content with my 2 perfect girls.
.-= MuddynoSugar´s last blog ..Roll on Spring =-.
I’m not yet 35 and am at least 10 if not more years older than most of the mums at my sons pre school.
I expect your world is perfect with you two girls already.
My husband and i decided after baby number 2 came along that we wouldn’t have any more. We gave away all the baby clothes etc. Then when she turned 18 months i got so broody i couldn’t see another baby without crying. i fell pregnant with our youngest fairly soon afterwards. I knew almost straight away that i didn’t want any more. She’s 2 and a half now and our family really does feel complete.
I was the same after Big E when we were trying for baby #2. Funny how when you want a baby so desperately that is all you can see!
I’m glad that you feel that sense of completeness now.
Mines not complete by far. I always wanted two but now when I’ve only got one, I know even two may not be enough, I love children and I love being a mother, its what I’m best at, for me its physical implications which will affect how many I have rather than anything else due to my unique layout
.-= Hayley´s last blog ..Tackling a 3 year olds sleep problems head on… =-.
I’m right in thinking you have a bi-corn yes? I have too, but only slight. Had implications for us too but not insurmountable.
((Hugs Hayley))
x
I am 100%, absolutely, totally, completely broody too at the moment.
We’ve just one little one at the moment, who is 3 & i have completely loved the 3yrs we have had with him & feel totally ready to do it again – i’ve been able to give him all the things he needs & all the attention he desires, which is why we have left it a little while to get to this stage now, because i’d like to be able to do the same with any other little person that makes their way into our lives.
I’ve recently had a missed miscarriage, which was hideous, but am slowly coming through it & feel very ready to get play the baby game once again. *fingers crossed*
My thoughts – go on, have another! xx
(((Huge Hugs Jordan)))
I totally understand the pain and devastation of miscarriage.
I have everything crossed for you xxxxx
my two are quite enough for me, thank you very much. I don’t intend to have any more. I don’t think I’d survive!
.-= Heather´s last blog ..The TV Dilema: how do you manage it? =-.
Ha! I’m barely surviving with two at the moment
I’m figuring this phase will passes when Little E is a bit bigger so maybe I can work round it……or maybe I’m crackers!?
Totally understand! I have one and just had a miscarriage in August. I was 11 wks. I’m feeling too scared and nervous to try again, but I know I want at least one more. I think 3 would be nice, my hubby isn’t sold yet. I keep reminding him, with an odd number, there’s always a deciding vote. We’ll see what happens. Good luck with your choice.. .
((hugs)) I found out about my miscarriage when we went for my 12wk scan, so know how you are feeling.
Lots of luck to you when trying for another, xx
((Hugs)) I was petrified of trying again after my miscarriages. Wasn’t sure if I could go through it all again. But, inspite of it all I coped. I had to.
Give yourself time.
xxxx
I have two boys and am giving away the baby clothes as the younger outgrows them, but I can’t help thinking “What if we had another?” What we’ve said is that we’ll wait a few years and then think about it. I’m thirty-two now so we do have a little time in hand. I desperately need to get my career back on track, since I don’t have the option of being a stay-at-home mum, and at the moment we don’t have the money for a larger family.
A factor in our case that wouldn’t affect you is that if we did try for another baby we would be very much hoping for a girl. And that seems unfair on the poor kid if he does turn out to be a third boy.
.-= Dot´s last blog ..Pilf =-.
I’ve given away most of both mine’s outgrown clothes already so we’d be starting from scratch in that department. Affording all that comes with a baby is a big big worry indeed.
I’ve never really been a broody person. It kicked in *after* we had decided our family was complete. I have 3 children and a step-daughter. Enough said. However every time I see a cute baby now, despite not really being a “baby person” I feel twinges of, “oh wouldn’t it be nice to have those baby days again.
I can enjoy those feelings as I have the safety net of our decision already being made. The feelings are temporary, and I find that when I see a pregnant lady with toddlers in tow now, the first thought that jumps into my head is “you poor thing”. The first year and a bit after having my youngest, I found really, really hard.
I think the broody feeling is nature’s clever way of making sure the population doesn’t die out completely. I can tell you that having three takes you to a whole new level of exhaustion, and juggling the needs of all of them can be tricky. I wouldn’t be without them though.
x x
.-= Rebecca (aka @Boolawoola)´s last blog ..Boolawoola: @Keris Ah that is good! Perhaps the stars is not the most important thing after all! I can only imagine how worrying it is though. =-.
I think I already hit that whole new level of exhaustion. There’s another deeper one? YIKES!!
Maybe my broodiness will pass. Only time will tell.
Truthfully, I felt my family was complete when Amy and I found the Farmer. I’ve never yearned for another baby since Amy was born.
CJ xx
That sounds just perfect CJ, and very lucky they are to have you to complete them too.
I started thinking about a fourth straight after Little A was born. . I was thinking I’d love a brother for Mr. R. But somehow I think that may not happen. Feel a bit sad typing this …
.-= Dymphna´s last blog ..Mr. R =-.
Oh ((Hugs)) Dymphna! Don’t be sad.
xxx
I have 3 boys, and I dont know how many people Ive told that now my family is at last complete. The truth is though, my littlest man is 10 months now and I’m broody already. I think I always will be to be honest. I love babies! Dont tell my hubby though. I think hes looking forward to the day we get a full nights sleep!
Maybe I’ll always be broody too? Goodness know my last pregnancy was enough to put me off for life….but didn’t!
I won’t tell your hubby, promise.
Well I have the one and its not that I don’t want another, as I do. Just not yet. My sister in law had a babe this week and I hold her and there is a yearning for a little tiny baby, however at the same time the love for Baba overtakes this and I end up thinking not yet. Baba is only 16 months so I would like to wait another nine months before trying.
Mr L however completely a different story, he wants another now! Every day I get asked the same question can we have another one? So I am living with a broody other half at the moment.
My husband wanted children before I did and I reckon he’d carry on having more if I let him!
Big E was 21 months when I fell pregnant and understood alot more than I realised. These little people are amazing!
I don’t! Still thinking about it. Scared of Bosnian doctors so not that keen on venturing into that world just yet, but maybe, when we get back…
.-= Brit In Bosnia´s last blog ..Olympic spirit =-.
Ooooo, exiting!
I think I’d be scared having a baby anywhere but my home county nevermind another counrty.
I think I will always want another. I always dreamt of having a big family … at least 3-4 kids. My husband has said no though. At first I was really upset, but now (2 years later!) I am getting used to the idea. It got easier as we grew out of nappies and pushchairs … the thought of going back to that stage makes it easier to move on.
However, I have 4 pregnant friends and I know that when I hold each of those babies my heart is going to break a little.
Ah lovely Laura! Pregnant friends and newborn babies really do tug those heartstrings.
Sending you a ((hug)) in a non Kathy Bates way.
I’m very broody 10 months after having my 4th baby. My husband thinks I’m nuts and is determined we’re having no more! My 4th was really supposed to be our last but I can’t shake off the niggly doubt that I’m not done…what if I’m one of these women who just doesn’t know when to stop??? I think that’s what my husband is afraid of!!
You see I can imagine me with 3 but 4 or (gulp) 5 I just can’t see.
The moment Snaffles was born I knew I wanted to do it again. Sadly it took me 2 years to convince Mr C likewise. At the moment it doesnt appear that destiny wants us to be a family of four though
((Hugs Missus)) xxx
We would have just kept going if health hadnt been an issue, took 10 years to get maxi, then mini came along very quickly after (I guess they were like buses), then I had to have my ovaries removed.
We both adore children and would have had at least 4 if we could. But we adore the 2 we have and I am resigning myself to them, with the possibility of fostering or adopting
.-= The Mad House´s last blog ..Menu Plan Monday and shortbread recipe =-.
One of my biggest regrets is putting off having kids for so long, then when we were ready we had problems.
You make me realise that no matter how we envisage our futures sometimes you’ve just got to do it ‘now’ and forget the grand plan, because life isn;t always someting you can plan.
xxxx
I’m pregnant with a fourth, and definitely now feel ‘done’. I always felt there was someone missing with three, when out in the park with them I’d look around for the missing fourth, then remember that he or she didn’t exist. I’m one of four, so is my husband, it just feels the right number. Though by any reckoning it’s more than enough! Good luck working it out. Two healthy children is fab, and if you’re lucky enough to have another, that’s pretty fab too.
.-= angelsandurchinsblog´s last blog ..Top ten surreal mummy moments =-.
There seems to be a general consensus that ‘you just know’. Must be that female intuition kicking in.
Congratulations and good luck with baby #4!
xxx
Oooh the broody bug! i was bitten and now i’m 28weeks pregnant lol! Being pregnant with my 5th will show you that you can manage if you want too, i found going from 1baby to 2babies was hard but going from 2babies to 3babies was much easier so much so i kept on going.
Finance wise, you get more tax credits, more child benefit and you probably have plently of baby stuff from your other two so it’s not that bad. Babies needs warmth, love and food so as long as you can offer that (which i’m sure you can) then go for it. I’m not a millionaire but we get by with my 4.
i know my family is complete now with my 4girls and my soon to be here boy. 5 is enough for me and i am very happy xxxx
You say 5 is enough now but I’m waiting ’til you change you blog to and one more means six next Christmas Amy
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You’re right, we would have so much kit left, it’d mainly be clothes as I tend to give them away!
Gosh not long for you now!!
I have 2 young children and still have moments of broodiness, but we have decided to stick at 2. I nearly had twins with my second child (it started as a twin pregnancy but one died at about 6 weeks), and also I think I’d have to stop at some point. At some point you’d have to deal with having no more children, whether it’s after 1, 2, or 10, so this is where we’re drawing the line. Also, my 20 month old son is the most wonderful little boy ever and so it could only be downhill from there – can’t top him!
My blog (latest post ‘Birth of my daughter’): http://www.flamingimp.com/blog
We’re happily sticking with two although the M.I.L would love a little girl! Families are never complete – just think of all the grandchildren to come….!! x
.-= Hot Cross Mum´s last blog ..Surreal, but true. =-.
Complete? We have a blended family of five… and we’re trying for another! Our family is complete but we love the big happy household so one (or two?!) more can only enhance it!
.-= Michelle´s last blog ..Happy Pancake Day! =-.
Sounds like you have a big heart and a home full of love!
I have one of each so I think that’s enough for me although if I didn’t have to work I would probably have more, although my husband has other ideas lol
Theres an award for you over at my blog btw….
I’m going back to works soon so I suppose I should really think twice about the financial implicationss.
Thanks for the award. xx