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	<title>Insomniac Mummy &#187; Advertise</title>
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	<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com</link>
	<description>{Sleepless in Suburbia}</description>
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		<title>The Village Laughter Store</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/08/the-village-laughter-store.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/08/the-village-laughter-store.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Aug 2010 09:42:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Family]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Andy Watson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[comedy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dominic Elliot Spencer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gareth Unwin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kahn Johnson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Letty Flynn]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lewis Charlworth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rosina's Restaurant and wine bar]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rosina's Saltaire]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stand-up Comedy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stand-up comedy night]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Village Laughter Store]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=1728</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;d like introduce you to a little project my family has been working on which launches tonight! If you&#8217;re local then come along! It&#8217;s going to be popular so arrive early to avoid disappoinment! You can find them online at www.villagelaughterstore.co.uk or follow them on Twitter @VillageLaughter.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p style="text-align: left;">I&#8217;d like introduce you to a little project my family has been working on which launches tonight!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">If you&#8217;re local then come along! It&#8217;s going to be popular so arrive early to avoid disappoinment!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/vls-FLYER.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-1727" title="vls FLYER" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/vls-FLYER-723x1024.jpg" alt="" width="434" height="614" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">You can find them online at <a href="http://www.villagelaughterstore.co.uk" target="_blank">www.villagelaughterstore.co.uk</a> or follow them on Twitter <a href="http://www.twitter.com/villagelaughter" target="_blank">@VillageLaughter</a>.</p>
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		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<title>Trinkets and Tokens &#8211; Molly Brown London</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/08/trinkets-and-tokens-molly-brown-london.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/08/trinkets-and-tokens-molly-brown-london.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Aug 2010 00:56:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sponsored post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children's jewellery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chirstening bangle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[christening gifts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[christening jewellery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[girl's jewellery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Molly Brown]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Molly Brown London]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Trinkets and tokens]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=1716</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. A very long time ago, when I was a little girl of just four or five I remember being fascinated with my Grandma&#8217;s jewellery box. To me it was a thing of wonderment, filled with beautiful trinkets and treasures. So enamoured was I, I was given my very own jewellery [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/alphabet-initial-necklace.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-1719 alignright" title="alphabet-initial-necklace" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/alphabet-initial-necklace-300x300.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="300" /></a>This is a <a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">sponsored post</a>.</p>
<p>A very long time ago, when I was a little girl of just four or five I remember being fascinated with my Grandma&#8217;s jewellery box.</p>
<p>To me it was a thing of wonderment, filled with beautiful trinkets and treasures. So enamoured was I, I was given my very own jewellery box for Christmas that year. It was made of white satin with a gold clasp and when opened, inside danced a tiny ballerina to the music box melody of &#8216;Raindrops keep falling on my head&#8217;.</p>
<p>Inside that special box I kept my very own treasures, including my first piece of jewellery, a sterling silver heart ring.</p>
<p>That pretty little box and its contents held so many special memories for me. One day, I hope that I can create share some similar memories with my lovely Little E.</p>
<p>But what would I choose for her? Something beautiful, just like her? Certainly. And, I know exactly where my search would begin!</p>
<p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/blue-aurora-fairy-bracelet.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1722" title="blue-aurora-fairy-bracelet" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/blue-aurora-fairy-bracelet-300x300.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="300" /></a>Molly Brown London, described as &#8216;Tiffany&#8217;s for children&#8217; by UK Vogue, is the UK&#8217;s leading children&#8217;s jewellery brand. Their collections are abundant with beautifully crafted pieces which are just perfect for little and older girls alike. From <a href="http://www.mollybrownlondon.com/gift-guides/christening-gifts.html" target="_blank">christening jewellery</a> to birthday gifts and beyond, there are stunning gifts for every little girl.</p>
<p>The jewellery itself is crafted from precious metals, gorgeous freshwater pearls and gemstones chosen for their clarity, each piece being finished of with Molly Brown London&#8217;s signature sterling silver tag. It&#8217;s altogether absolutely stunning.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve spent a virtual fortune just browsing, there are so many lovely pieces to choose from!</p>
<p>Now all I need to do is convince Little E&#8217;s Daddy, and let the memory making begin.
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Win with Andrex Pup-o-matic on Facebook</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/06/win-with-andrex-pup-o-matic-on-facebook.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/06/win-with-andrex-pup-o-matic-on-facebook.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 17 Jun 2010 00:12:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sponsored post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Andrex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Andrex competition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Facebook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Facebook competition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pup-o-matic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Andrex Pup-o-matic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Andrex Puppy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Andrex Puppy on Facebook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Win a Nintendo DSi]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Win a Nintendo Wii]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Win A Playstation 3]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Win a Sony Cybershot Camera]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[win an X Box 360]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Win M&S vouchers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[win Next Vouchers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[win with Andrex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=1475</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. It seems the whole world and his dog have a Facebook page these days. No really, even the Andrex Puppy! As part of their &#8216;Soft, strong and long&#8217; campaign Andrex is offering its Facebook fans the chance to win one of thirty top prizes prizes everyday, by playing &#8216;The Pup-o-matic&#8217;. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Andrex-Puppy-on-Facebook.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-1478 alignright" title="Andrex Puppy on Facebook" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Andrex-Puppy-on-Facebook-300x300.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="300" /></a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>It seems the whole world and his dog have a Facebook page these days. No really, even the <a href="http://www.facebook.com/TheAndrexPuppy" target="_blank">Andrex Puppy</a>!</p>
<p>As part of their &#8216;Soft, strong and long&#8217; campaign Andrex is offering its Facebook fans the chance to win one of thirty top prizes prizes everyday, by playing &#8216;The Pup-o-matic&#8217;.</p>
<p>Each day from now until the 5th July Facebook fans will be able to play The Pup-o-matic between 7am and 7pm. Much like a slot machine, execpt with the fruit replaced with the dogs from <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-reVUJzMnx0" target="_blank">Andrex&#8217;s new advertising campaign</a>, all you have to do is &#8216;pull&#8217; the Pup-o-matic, match the dogs and hey presto! A prize could be yours.</p>
<p>The fabulous prizes up for grabs include a Sony Cybershot Digital camera, Nintendo Wii, Playstation 3, X Box 360, Nintendo DSi, plus gift vouchers for highstreet favourites Next, M&amp;S and Tesco, money off vouchers for Andrex, and of course plenty of Andrex puppy goodies.</p>
<p>And the best bit? It&#8217;s completely free! No purchase is necessary, all you have to do is &#8216;like&#8217; The Andrex Puppy on Facebook at <a href="http://www.facebook.com/TheAndrexPuppy" target="_blank">www.facebook.com/The AndrexPuppy</a>, click the &#8216;Pup-o-matic&#8217; tab and get playing.</p>
<p>Easy.</p>
<p>Run along now, there are prizes to be won!
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		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Bounty &#8211; The UK&#8217;s Favourite Parenting Club</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/bounty-the-uks-favourite-parenting-club.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/bounty-the-uks-favourite-parenting-club.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 Apr 2010 10:50:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sponsored post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bounty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bounty Packs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bounty.com]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dad to be]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[expectant father]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[expecting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[information for parents]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mumto be]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting advice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting website]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pregnancy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pregnancy advice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pregnancy week by week]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The UK's Favourite Parenting Club]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=1146</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. As a parent in the 21st century, I&#8217;m endlessly thankful that I live in an age where information about virtually anything is at my finger tips. Since becoming pregnant for the first time, and giving birth to my two gorgeous children, the Internet has been my lifeline where all things [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.bounty.com/pregnancy"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1155" title="120x600" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/120x600.gif" alt="" width="432" height="62" /></a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>As a parent in the 21st century, I&#8217;m endlessly thankful that I live in an age where information about virtually anything is at my finger tips.</p>
<p>Since becoming pregnant for the first time, and giving birth to my two gorgeous children, the Internet has been my lifeline where all things pregnancy, baby and toddler are concerned. And, with sites like Bounty.com, there is excellent, free advice available online in a few simple clicks.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m sure most Mums in the UK have heard of <a href="http://www.bounty.com" target="_blank">Bounty</a>. I remember being given the token to collect my Bounty Pack and (in the best fashion I could in my hugely pregnant state), almost skipping down to Boots to go and collect it. Then there were the New Mum Bounty packs I received in hospital, full of sample sized goodies, vouchers and very importantly, the forms I needed to fill in to claim Child Benefit.</p>
<p>These days Bounty does much much more than provide freebies to new mums. As the &#8216;UK&#8217;s Favourite Parenting Club&#8217;, Bounty.com is the perfect parenting site for any mum or mum-to-be.</p>
<p>From conception to <a href="http://www.bounty.com/pregnancy" target="_blank">pregnancy</a>, birth and beyond, Bounty is jam packed with articles and information to help, reassure and sometimes simply make you smile.</p>
<p>Bounty&#8217;s <a href="http://www.bounty.com/pregnancy" target="_blank">pregnancy week by week</a> section helps you understand what to expect at every crucial stage. From feelings and worries to appointments and birth options, there is a wealth of knowledge available.</p>
<p>Worried how you&#8217;re going to cope with your newborn bundle? Bounty.com&#8217;s &#8216;Baby&#8217; section has articles galore to help you wade through those early days, weeks and months. There&#8217;s also a separate mini site, &#8216;<a href="http://www.newdadssurvivalguide.com" target="_blank">The New Dad&#8217;s Survival Guide</a>&#8216; for expectant fathers, because Dad&#8217;s need support on their journey into fatherhood too.</p>
<p>For those times when only the advice of another parent will suffice, the Bounty forum allows you to reach out and connect with like minded people and benefit from each others knowledge, and perhaps even find a shoulder to cry on or make a new friend.</p>
<p>So, if you&#8217;re looking a great website for all things pregnancy, baby and parenting then Bounty.com is an excellent choice.</p>
<p>Why not pop over and join &#8216;The UK&#8217;s Favourite Parenting Club&#8217; today?
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		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>Burn those Post Easter Calories with a British Gas Free Family Swim</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/burn-those-post-easter-calories-with-a-british-gas-free-family-swim.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/burn-those-post-easter-calories-with-a-british-gas-free-family-swim.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Apr 2010 00:20:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sponsored post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[British Gas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[British Gas Free Family Swim]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[British Gas Free Swim]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[British Swimming]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[British Swimming's Principal Partner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[claim your free family swim]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Exercise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Family exercise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Family Fun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Free healthy activity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Free Swimming Session]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Free Swimming Voucher]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Swimming]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=997</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. I don&#8217;t know about you, but the aftermath of Easter is still in full force in our house. Chocolate mountain has it&#8217;s own postcode in the corner of our kitchen and it seems to have developed a strange gravitational pull. It&#8217;s been estimated that this Easter in the UK alone, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/Rebecca-FFS.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1005" title="British Gas Free Family Swim" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/Rebecca-FFS.jpg" alt="" width="523" height="193" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I don&#8217;t know about you, but the aftermath of Easter is still in full force in our house. Chocolate mountain has it&#8217;s own postcode in the corner of our kitchen and it seems to have developed a strange gravitational pull.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s been estimated that this Easter in the UK alone, a staggering 80 million Easter eggs were sold, and at around 530 calories an egg, that&#8217;s rather a large amount of excess calories consumed that now need burning!</p>
<p>Never fear! Help is at hand to assist you and I to get those extra calories shifted.</p>
<p>In it&#8217;s role as British Swimming&#8217;s principal  partner, British Gas is committed to getting more people taking a dip in their local pool and is offering all its customers a free family swim for up to two adults and three children. Not only is swimming the perfect family activity, it will also help  burn those chocolate fuelled Easter calories, saving you a few ponds along the way.</p>
<p>All you have to do to claim your free family swim is visit <a href="http://www.britishgasswimming.co.uk" target="_blank">www.britishgasswimming.co.uk</a> and follow a few simple steps:</p>
<ol>
<li>Enter your British Gas customer details and how many swimmers you&#8217;ll be taking.</li>
<li>Choose a participating pool near you.</li>
<li>Print your free family swim voucher or choose to have it posted to you.</li>
<li>Enjoy your day out at the pool!</li>
</ol>
<p>So why not go dig out your British Gas customer details and get your free family swim booked?  It&#8217;s good for you and great fun too!
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Shoes, glorious shoes! &#8211; Buying and fitting children&#8217;s shoes with Start-rite</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/shoes-glorious-shoes-buying-and-fitting-childrens-shoes-with-start-rite.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/shoes-glorious-shoes-buying-and-fitting-childrens-shoes-with-start-rite.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 15 Apr 2010 01:22:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[baby shoes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children's shoe fitting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children's shoe fitting guide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children's shoes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[girls sandals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[measuring children's feet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[measuring children's feet correctly]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pre-walker shoes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[shoe gauge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[shoes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Start-rite]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[startrite]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[startrite measuring guide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Startrite shoes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[when to buy your baby's first shoes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=1038</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. As Little E rapidly approaches her first birthday I&#8217;ve started to think about buying her first pair of shoes. Up to now she&#8217;s only ever worn socks or tights on her feet and often goes barefoot as I&#8217;ve always believed that not restricting children&#8217;s feet before they can walk is [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>As Little E rapidly approaches her first birthday I&#8217;ve started to think about buying her first pair of shoes.</p>
<p>Up to now she&#8217;s only ever worn socks or tights on her feet and often goes barefoot as I&#8217;ve always believed that not restricting children&#8217;s feet before they can walk is better for their development and the growth of delicate bones.</p>
<p>But, as she&#8217;s tentatively beginning to cruise round the furniture, and spending more time playing outside at nursery, I&#8217;m certain the time for her first pair of shoes will arrive fairly quickly.</p>
<p>As the warmer weather approaches and the shoe shops begin to bring in their stock of <a href="http://www.startriteshoes.com/girls/sandals" target="_blank">girls sandals</a> I&#8217;m looking forward to being able to treat Little E to her first pair of shoes, after all it&#8217;s a monumental event in any little girl&#8217;s life.</p>
<p>I have fond memories of shoe shopping with my parents and grandparents as a small girl. The shoe shop was always a place of wonderment. Every little girl I knew wanted a pair of black patent leather shoes. I remember my Mum taking me, on the bus, into town to have my feet specially measured and fitted for the perfect pair.</p>
<p>These days, thanks to the quirks of the modern age and the Internet, you can now fit your children&#8217;s shoes at home, with a little help from Start-rite&#8217;s <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LCG6avOq_U" target="_blank">shoe gauge</a>. Available to buy in two sizes, the gauge enables you to accurately measure your child&#8217;s foot in the comfort of your own home without having to contend with the stress of  a crowded shoe shop.</p>
<p>Once your shoes arrive you can make sure they are the perfect fit by following the advice in Start-rite&#8217;s excellent <a href="http://www.startriteshoes.com/fitting/fitting-videos" target="_blank">fitting guide videos</a>.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="344" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/8LCG6avOq_U&amp;hl=en_GB&amp;fs=1&amp;rel=0&amp;color1=0x2b405b&amp;color2=0x6b8ab6" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/8LCG6avOq_U&amp;hl=en_GB&amp;fs=1&amp;rel=0&amp;color1=0x2b405b&amp;color2=0x6b8ab6" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>It all looks fairly straightforward to me, and I&#8217;m certain I&#8217;d have the confidence to give measuring both Little E &amp; Big E&#8217;s feet a whirl.</p>
<p>The only real problem I&#8217;d have is limiting my purchases to one pair of shoes each!</p>
<p>So many shoes, so little time&#8230;.
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		<title>New Domino&#8217;s Pizza Cash Rewards Widget</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/new-dominos-pizza-cash-rewards-widget.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/new-dominos-pizza-cash-rewards-widget.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 13 Apr 2010 23:24:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[affiliate window]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Domino's affilate widget]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[domino's affiliate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Domino's Pizza]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Domino's Pizza Cash Rewards Widget]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[domino's pizza facebook widget]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Domino's Pizza Widget]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[embed code]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Facebook widget]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pizza]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=1010</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. It&#8217;s no secrect that the husband and I like to indulge in a Domino&#8217;s Pizza every once in a while. Once the kids are safely tucked up in bed we order online, get comfy on the sofa and watch a movie while munching on our favourite pizza. Wouldn&#8217;t it be [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>It&#8217;s no secrect that the husband and I like to indulge in a Domino&#8217;s Pizza every once in a while. Once the kids are safely tucked up in bed we order online, get comfy on the sofa and watch a movie while munching on our favourite pizza.</p>
<p>Wouldn&#8217;t it be brilliant if you and your friends could <a href="http://www.dominos.co.uk/" target="_blank">order pizza online</a> and make money at the same time?</p>
<p>With introduction of the new <a href="www.dominos.co.uk/widget " target="_blank">Domino&#8217;s widget</a> you can do just that!</p>
<p>Domino&#8217;s are offering you the opportunity to add the Domino&#8217;s affiliate widget to your blog, Facebook, infact just about anywhere you can embed the code. All you have to do is register at <a href="http://www.dominos.co.uk/widget" target="_blank">www.dominos.co.uk/widget</a>, copy the relevant code and follow the instructions for installation.</p>
<p><center><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="300" height="250" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="data" value="http://widget.dominos.co.uk/dominos-affiliate-widget-300x250.swf?a=10858656" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always" /><param name="allowNetworkAccess" value="all" /><param name="src" value="http://widget.dominos.co.uk/dominos-affiliate-widget-300x250.swf?a=10858656" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="300" height="250" src="http://widget.dominos.co.uk/dominos-affiliate-widget-300x250.swf?a=10858656" allownetworkaccess="all" allowscriptaccess="always" wmode="transparent" data="http://widget.dominos.co.uk/dominos-affiliate-widget-300x250.swf?a=10858656"></embed></object></center></p>
<p>Once installed, each time an order is placed via your widget you will earn a small slice of the profits back into your account equalling 0.5% of the price of every purchase. Once you start earning commission you&#8217;ll need to sign up with Domino&#8217;s affiliate partner Affiliate Window* to collect your cash.</p>
<p>Remember to ask all your pizza loving friends to order through your Domino&#8217;s widget and hopefully fairly soon you should see some small rewards for your hard work.</p>
<p>It really couldn&#8217;t be easier! What are you wating for?</p>
<address>*Affilliate Window registration incurs a £5 fee.<br />
</address>
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		<title>Tesco Compare Home Insurance</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/tesco-compare-home-insurance.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/04/tesco-compare-home-insurance.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 07 Apr 2010 11:39:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sponsored post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=411</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. I like to think of my self as a thrifty shopper. If there is anything I want to buy you will find me eagerly tapping away online comparing prices and searching for the cheapest option. Some would say I&#8217;m a skin flit, I reckon it&#8217;s pretty savvy. I&#8217;m especially careful [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p>This is a sponsored post.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Tesco-House.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-414" title="Tesco House" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Tesco-House.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="272" /></a>I like to think of my self as a thrifty shopper. If there is anything I want to buy you will find me eagerly tapping away online comparing prices and searching for the cheapest option. Some would say I&#8217;m a skin flit, I reckon it&#8217;s pretty savvy.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m especially careful with our spending when it comes to utilities and insurance. There&#8217;s something good about the feeling making a saving on your insurance gives you. My bank manager is always happier to see my out goings decrease too! The devil in me would wistfully imagine all the shoes I could buy with the savings.</p>
<p>In reality any savings we make go into the continual attempt to improve our home. According to these <a href="http://www.tescofinance.com/personal/finance/insurance/homeins/elh/five-easy-ways-to-increase-the-value-of-your-home.html" target="_blank">five easy ways to increase the value of your home</a> we&#8217;re already on the right track.</p>
<p>Last year we added a raised decking area to the, frankly, over grown garden. This year our aim is to add a lawn and make it child friendly. We&#8217;ll also need to add a small shed or similar to house the outdoor toys, trikes and bikes. Of course, this means that we&#8217;ll need to make sure our insurance policy covers the shed and its contents.</p>
<p>If your home insurance renewal date is looming why not have a look at what Tesco <a href="http://www.tescocompare.com/home.shtml" target="_blank">Compare home insurance</a> has to offer to get the right insurance for you?
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		<title>Gleeky Greetings from Sue Sylvester! &#8211; News of UK Glee DVD Release</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/03/gleeky-greetings-from-sue-sylvester-news-of-uk-glee-dvd-release.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/03/gleeky-greetings-from-sue-sylvester-news-of-uk-glee-dvd-release.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Mar 2010 07:40:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gleeky Greetings from Sue Sylvester! - News of UK Glee DVD Release]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=850</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Oh. My. Goodness. Outstanding. Roll on April 12th&#8230;..]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p>Oh. My. Goodness.</p>
<p>Outstanding.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="448" height="272" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/PM0dL8GpQbg&amp;hl=en_GB&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="448" height="272" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/PM0dL8GpQbg&amp;hl=en_GB&amp;fs=1&amp;" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>Roll on April 12th&#8230;..
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		<title>Domino&#8217;s Pizza</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/03/dominos-pizza.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/03/dominos-pizza.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Mar 2010 00:05:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sponsored post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Domino's Pizza]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[order a domino's pizza online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[order a pizza online]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pizza toppings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[takeaway pizza]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=794</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. I&#8217;m no Nigella Lawson in the kitchen. For starters she&#8217;s a posh brunette bird and I&#8217;m a bossy redhead from ooop north. Whilst I do enjoy cooking from scratch most of the time, every now and then I like to indulge in something a bit naughty and let someone do [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/dominos_pizza_logo.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-799 alignright" title="dominos_pizza_logo" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/dominos_pizza_logo.jpg" alt="" width="314" height="320" /></a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>I&#8217;m no Nigella Lawson in the kitchen. For starters she&#8217;s a posh brunette bird and I&#8217;m a bossy redhead from ooop north. Whilst I do enjoy cooking from scratch most of the time, every now and then I like to indulge in something a bit naughty and let someone do the cooking for me.</p>
<p>So every couple of weeks, on a Friday night <del datetime="2010-03-16T01:24:55+00:00">when the kids are in bed so they can&#8217;t steal our food</del> we put a DVD on, get cosy on the sofa and enjoy a takeaway. Sometimes we have a chinese, occasionally indian but by far and away the husband&#8217;s takeaway of choice is to get a <a href="http://www.dominos.co.uk/" target="_blank">pizza delivered</a> from Domino&#8217;s.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s just something about the humble pizza that makes it the perfect food for sharing. We order pizzas, potato wedges, coleslaw, and if we&#8217;re feeling particularly indulgent we occasionally have deliciously divine waffles with chocolate &amp; toffee dipping sauces. Very bad, but so very very goooood!</p>
<p>The husband like his pizza hot and spicy, the more jalepenos the better. Domino&#8217;s &#8216;Meltdown The Revenge&#8217; fits the bill perfectly. I&#8217;m a fan of anything barbeque sweet like the Texas Barbeque or I build my own as no pizza is complete for me if it doesn&#8217;t have pineapple topping.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s always more than enough to share around and then some.</p>
<p>What&#8217;s your perfect pizza topping? Go on inspire me!</p>
<p>If you&#8217;re thinking of  treating yourself to a pizza why not pop over to <a href="http://www.dominos.co.uk/" target="_blank">Domino&#8217;s online</a> and see what their menu has to tickle your fancy!
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		<title>Andrex &#8216;Win Your Mortgage Payments for a Year&#8217; Competition</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/03/andrex-win-your-mortgage-payments-for-a-year-competition.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/03/andrex-win-your-mortgage-payments-for-a-year-competition.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:01:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Advertise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[advertisement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Andrex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ASDA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Competition]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finances]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mortgage]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Win your mortgage payments for a year competition]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.insomniacmummy.com/?p=738</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. Wouldn&#8217;t it be great if you could ease the financial strain just a little and have your mortgage or rent paid for a whole year? In the current financial climate many of us would welcome that little bit of breathing room, Lord knows I certainly would! Well, that dream could [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Andrex-12-roll-ASDA-Pack-v2.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-742" title="Andrex 12 roll ASDA Pack v2" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Andrex-12-roll-ASDA-Pack-v2.jpg" alt="" width="268" height="189" /></a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>Wouldn&#8217;t it be great if you could ease the financial strain just a little and have your mortgage or rent paid for a whole year? In the current financial climate many of us would welcome that little bit of breathing room, Lord knows I certainly would!</p>
<p>Well, that dream could become a reality with the <a href="http://www.andrexpuppypoints.co.uk/asda/" target="_blank">Andrex &#8216;Win Your Mortgage Payments for a Year&#8217; Competition</a>. Andrex will be paying one lucky winner&#8217;s mortgage or rent payments, (up to the value of £12000) for an entire year.</p>
<p>All you have to do to enter is:</p>
<ol>
<li>Buy a promotional pack of Andrex from ASDA (as pictured above), available for one week only from Monday 15th March 2010.</li>
<li>Go to <a href="http://www.andrexpuppypoints.co.uk/asda/" target="_blank">www.andrexpuppypoints.co.uk/asda</a> and sign up.</li>
<li>Enter the code inside the pack for one entry into the competition.</li>
</ol>
<p>It really couldn&#8217;t be easier! I&#8217;m already imagining all the lovely things we could do with that little bit of financial leeway.</p>
<p>Oh! Would you look at that, I appear to have just this minute run out of loo roll!</p>
<p>Better pop down to ASDA&#8230;..
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		<title>Daydreaming about holidays with Thomas Cook Style</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/02/daydreaming-about-holidays-with-thomas-cook-style.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 22 Feb 2010 01:00:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
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		<category><![CDATA[holiday advert post]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[holidays]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Thomas Cook Style Advertorial Post]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. It&#8217;s that time of year when everyone is getting just a little bit fed up of the winter here in the UK. After one of the coldest winters in a long time, and with summer seemingly a long way ahead on the horizon, lots of folk are beginning to get [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Sea-Holiday.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-539" title="Sea Holiday" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Sea-Holiday.jpg" alt="" width="224" height="300" /></a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>It&#8217;s that time of year when everyone is getting just a little bit fed up of the winter here in the UK.</p>
<p>After one of the coldest winters in a long time, and with summer seemingly a long way ahead on the horizon, lots of folk are beginning to get the wanderlust again and are starting to plan their summer holidays.</p>
<p>And who can blame them?</p>
<p>We&#8217;ve not managed to get abroad in a long while, seven years to be exact, but after browsing around on <a href="http://www.thomascookstyle.com/" target="_blank">Thomas Cook Style</a> I&#8217;m beginning to wonder if we should take the plunge this year. In the past we&#8217;ve taken most of our summer <a href="http://www.thomascookstyle.com/holiday-destination/spain" target="_blank">holidays in Spain</a>, either on the main land or the Balearics.</p>
<p>We went on honeymoon to Fuerteventura when it was still a relatively quiet destination and always said we&#8217;d love to go back once we had children. The gently shelving beach at Caleta de Fuste is perfect for families and we imagined that one day we would take them back with us.</p>
<p>The artist in me has always dreamed of <a href="http://www.thomascookstyle.com/holiday-destination/italy" target="_blank">holidays in Italy</a>. I imagine myself watching the evening sunset from a villa over looking lake Garda, the husband in the kitchen rustling up something delicious with local Italian fare and the children playing happily in the late evening sun. Bliss.</p>
<p>Of course all this may just be idle daydreaming as the likelihood is that we&#8217;ll probably, once again, end up holiday with family somewhere in the UK and the dream of distant shores will just have to wait for another year.</p>
<p>Sigh.</p>
<p>What are your holiday plans this summer?
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		<title>Love the Garden</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/02/love-the-garden.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 19 Feb 2010 01:31:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. Our garden isn&#8217;t much to write home about. For the last 10 years it&#8217;s been a slow work in progress. Still though, one thing on my ideal wish list remains absent. A lawn. This year I&#8217;ve finally persuaded my husband to put the icing on the cake and we are [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/disclosure" target="_blank">This is a sponsored post</a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Wales-2007-116.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-500" title="Wales 2007 116" src="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Wales-2007-116-225x300.jpg" alt="" width="225" height="300" /></a>.</p>
<p>Our garden isn&#8217;t much to write home about. For the last 10 years it&#8217;s been a slow work in progress.</p>
<p>Still though, one thing on my ideal wish list remains absent.</p>
<p>A lawn.</p>
<p>This year I&#8217;ve finally persuaded my husband to put the icing on the cake and we are going to lay ourselves lots of lovely lush green grass to replace our old gravelled area. This of course means that I&#8217;m going to have to brush up on <a href="http://www.lovethegarden.com/lawncare" target="_blank">lawn care</a> which I&#8217;m currently doing with the help of <a href="http://www.lovethegarden.com/" target="_blank">Love the Garden</a>.</p>
<p>Living on a steep hill it&#8217;s been a bit of a challenge to make the garden easy to use. One fine spring, a few years back, we dug it into three tiered layers. It took a week of digging in which I lost over half a stone in weight! We ended up with a patio at the top, a gravelled area in the middle with terracotta planters and another smaller patio at the bottom, enclosed on one side by a fence and the other two by the old privet hedge.</p>
<p>Being utter novices (and I not in the least green fingered!) we only chose easy care plants. We chose a few ferns, a buddleia, a beautiful yellow rose bush which we planted in remembrance of my mother in law, and in spring we&#8217;d treat ourselves to some lobelias and pansies just for a splash of colour.</p>
<p>We&#8217;re hoping the addition of a lovely lawn in place of the gravel will mean our garden will finally be somewhere our children can play and we&#8217;re even considering adding in a little raised flower bed so they can start planting their own flowers or maybe even some vegetables.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.lovethegarden.com/" target="_blank">Love the Garden</a> has lots of tips, tricks and advice for enhancing your garden so if you fancy getting a bit green fingered, why not pop on over and see what you could grow this year.
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		<title>Secret Abilities &#8211; Competition</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2010/01/secret-abilities-competition.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 27 Jan 2010 01:26:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post. Do you have a secret ability? Why not share it in the Heinz Secret Abilities Competition for the opportunity to win £1000! All you have to do is upload a video of you demonstrating your Secret Ability on the Secret Abilities site and you could be in with a chance [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2009/11/disclosure-policy.html">This is a sponsored post.</a></p>
<p>Do you have a secret ability?</p>
<p>Why not share it in the <a href="http://www.lovesauces.co.uk/promotions/secretabilities/#ours">Heinz Secret Abilities Competition</a> for the opportunity to win £1000! All you have to do is upload a video of you demonstrating your Secret Ability on the <a href="http://www.lovesauces.co.uk/promotions/secretabilities/Submit.aspx">Secret Abilities</a> site and you could be in with a chance of winning one of their prizes.</p>
<p>What are mine? Now let me see&#8230;..</p>
<p>In my daydreams I often like to imagine myself as &#8216;Uber-Mum&#8217;. I have the secret ability to whizz through the household chores while keeping the kids clean fed and entertained, all whilst not breaking a sweat, or a nail, looking glossy &amp; groomed and maintaining a fabulously sparkling social life.</p>
<p>Sadly my &#8216;actual&#8217; secret abilities are far, far, faaaaaar less useful. They are, in fact, erring on the side of odd. Cases in point:</p>
<ul>
<li>I can turn my right foot completely the wrong way round and still stand up.</li>
<li>I can predict who&#8217;s on the phone when it rings.</li>
<li>I can bend down and put my hands flat on the floor with my legs straight.</li>
<li>I can predict how much we have spent on shopping at the supermarket to within £1.</li>
<li>I can &#8216;hear&#8217; electricity.</li>
</ul>
<p>A genuine secret ability would be cooler but I&#8217;d settle for being able to tie a knot in a cherry stalk with my tongue like Sherilyn Fenn in Twin Peaks. Utterly useless, but sexy.</p>
<p>In the meantime I&#8217;ll leave you with the Tollbooth Telepath and her amazing secret ability to predict the colour of oncoming cars. Don&#8217;t forget to upload your <a href="http://www.lovesauces.co.uk/promotions/secretabilities/#ours">Secret Abilities</a>too!</p>
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		<title>Rules for a Perfect Family Christmas</title>
		<link>http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2009/11/rules-for-perfect-family-christmas-2.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 18 Nov 2009 23:50:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellie</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[This is a sponsored post John Lewis are compiling &#8216;Rules for a Perfect Family Christmas&#8217; on their website to gather inspiration for families in time for the festive season and have asked me if I&#8217;d like to share our family &#8216;rules&#8217;. You will obey&#8230;.. The Children I am very strict when it comes to buying [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.johnlewis.com/230487434/Product.aspx" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5405594554487516162" style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 298px; height: 298px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ebpapniLAOw/SwSHm3QDrAI/AAAAAAAAAKA/BTAYLomuX7U/s320/Tree.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><a href="http://www.insomniacmummy.com/2009/11/disclosure-policy.html">This is a sponsored post</a></p>
<p><a href="http://www.johnlewis.com/Christmas/Area.aspx">John Lewis</a> are compiling &#8216;Rules for a Perfect Family Christmas&#8217; on their website to gather inspiration for families in time for the festive season and have asked me if I&#8217;d like to share our family &#8216;rules&#8217;.</p>
<p>You will obey&#8230;..</p>
<p><span style="font-weight: bold;">The Children</span></p>
<p>I am very strict when it comes to buying presents for the children.  No buying noisy toys, no psychedelic plastic carbuncles, and under no circumstances buy anything that sings anything on repeat repeatedly over and over ad nauseum.</p>
<p>What do you mean, &#8220;Why have<span style="font-style: italic;"> I </span>bought them a load of bright plastic tat?&#8221; I made the rule&#8217;s I&#8217;ll break &#8216;em at will. OK? Good.</p>
<p>Fun must be had at all times by the small people. It&#8217;s the law.</p>
<p><span style="font-weight: bold;">The Christmas Meal</span></p>
<p>Under no circumstances must anyone,<span style="font-style: italic;"> anyone</span> interfere with anything in the kitchen on Christmas Day. I will have planned each detail with military precision. You will not stir the gravy or chop a carrot. Imagine if you chopped circles instead of batons? What do you mean you want to mash the potatoes? Leave the sodding prawns alone! GET BACK IN THE LIVING ROOM!! Having a cold sweat now. Brrrrr.</p>
<p>Mess with my focus at your peril.</p>
<p>The table must be set by the husband and my brothers then I will inspect their efforts and subsequently rearrange everything. It&#8217;s my prerogative.</p>
<p>If I serve dinner late you will politely decline to notice and instead applaud me for my timeliness and culinary brilliance.</p>
<p>It is compulsory to wear a paper hat and eat as much as humanly possible during the meal. Even though I will have cooked enough for most of the street <span style="font-style: italic;">it must all be eaten</span>. I didn&#8217;t just almost give myself a breakdown and lose a stone in sweat for nothing. Did I?</p>
<p>Note to self &#8211; Breathe. And relax.</p>
<p><span style="font-weight: bold;">The Family</span></p>
<p>The family must at all times stay out of the kitchen (please see &#8216;The Christmas Meal&#8217;). You will be fed bacon sandwiches for breakfast and must attempt to amuse the small people at all times.</p>
<p>I do not expect gifts but will accept offers to wash up after dinner (and if you don&#8217;t I will make hints until you cave in).</p>
<p>If you are one of my brothers or so inclined you will be required to take part in the traditional Christmas eating competition, whereby each competitor attempts to out eat the other. Usually consuming bacon sandwiches, Christmas dinner &amp; pudding, turkey sandwiches, Bombay mix, assorted nuts, chocolates &amp; nibbles. The winner is the last brother standing and the prize is nothing more than kudos.</p>
<p><span style="font-weight: bold;">The Entertainment </span></p>
<p>The entertainment mainly comes from the small people. They will probably force you to watch The Polar Express at least once and you may be required to play board games/build Lego/play trains.</p>
<p>Just because it is annoying, I may force you to play Charades, or  20 questions. As you are a guest in my home you will indulge me.</p>
<p>More likely than not we will require you to sing (badly) on SingStar.</p>
<p>Any activity will be done with a smile and you will at all time remember it is the season of goodwill (even when you&#8217;re losing the will).</p>
<p><span style="font-weight: bold;">Decorations</span></p>
<p>At some point during December I will ask the husband to put the tree up. I will then veto any effort he makes to decorate it and embark on a quest for balance and perfection.</p>
<p>The tree must be decorated in shades of gold. All ornaments must be evenly distributed as must the lights.</p>
<p>My tree is a thing of beauty and you will make appreciative Ooooo&#8217;s and Ahhhh&#8217;s when you behold it&#8217;s Christmassy gorgeousness.</p>
<p>So there you have my <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">laws</span> rules. I&#8217;m not really this bossy.</p>
<p>Honest&#8230;..</p>
<p><span style="font-size: 78%;">Image linked to its source.</span>
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